


5 Times Lincoln Knew Skye Could Never Be More Than A Friend

by Skyson



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Diary/Journal, F/M, Lincoln POV, Lincoln likes Skye, Lincoln stans Coulson, Stream of Consciousness, but Lincoln also sees things, much to Lincoln's surprise, skoulsonfest2k15redux, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-22
Updated: 2015-07-22
Packaged: 2018-04-10 13:33:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4393832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyson/pseuds/Skyson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a psychologist on base that we're all required to meet with once a week, at least for right now. He told me I should write things down. I didn't want to at first, for obvious reasons, but I'm finding it to be therapeutic...</p><p>(Written for Skoulson RomFest 2k15 REDUX, prompts used: ghost pain, junk food)</p>
            </blockquote>





	5 Times Lincoln Knew Skye Could Never Be More Than A Friend

1.

It wasn't like I _had designs on her_ or anything. Back in Afterlife, she had been new, different, and a breath of fresh air. And yeah, she was beautiful, too.

Finding out Cal was her father was enough to make me really consider pursuing something _more_ with Skye - was it worth my life? Because Cal was _nuts_. Then I learned about Jiaying being her mother and that was a bit uncomfortable because I didn't want to give the leader in charge any reason to be suspicious of me.

And _then_ Skye had to go and side with SHIELD - which, if I am still being honest, I wasn't that surprised. All those times she kept talking about Coulson... And then that day Gordon had saved her, and she thought no one heard her, but I did.

 _"Coulson was there,"_ She'd sounded so distraught. It had put a feeling of distaste in my mouth, though at the time I hadn't been certain why.

A war was starting, but we all still needed to eat, and I let her have my dessert when I noticed her eyeing it so heavily. I would do anything to make her feel better, even if it was only for a short time, and meant I had to give up my sweets for the day.

I didn't start putting the pieces together until I was standing in the halls of SHIELD, feeling like an invisible, very awkward outsider, as Skye and Coulson said their farewells. Geez, they acted as if they were never going to see one another again.

I saw Coulson's expression as Skye walked toward the door, and what was worse, I saw Skye's expression as well.

She was never going to completely side with the Inhumans, I knew it then.

Before we got back to Afterlife, I caught her whispering a request to Gordon for some Zebra Cakes.  _"Comfort food..."_ she had explained nervously, but he had immediately heeded her request.

 

 

2.

I had run into her stumbling back down from the upper decks of the Iliad, looking harrowed and pale. I put my arm around her waist to help her walk, trying to get out of her what had happened. All she did was shake her head, and then look even more concerned when we ran into a group of medics who looked to be in a serious rush. One of them had a radio on his belt and it chattered to life. All I could pick up was "director", and Skye was out of my grasp before I could wonder what it meant.

Of course. The Director of SHIELD - Coulson. Something must have happened.

I followed after Skye because I was worried. She could barely walk; she was holding herself up against the walls of the corridors as we followed the path of the medics, and her color wasn't returning. I still didn't know what had happened to her, and it terrified me to guess.

I had seen what Jiaying could do, what the price of her powers were. Skye's pallor was far too reminiscent...

I reached for her just as we neared a crammed doorway; a handful of the other SHIELD agents were all trying to look into the room, without entering. They had probably been ordered to keep out by the medics. Skye was trying to push her way through, and I took her elbow supportively before one of the bigger guys accidentally knocked her down. I tried to get her to relax, to rest, but the look in her eyes made me pause. She was terrified.

So, I helped her get through the small crowd. Turned out most of them were her friends, and they immediately moved out of the way for her, sad and worried looks on their faces. I wondered what had happened, and then I caught sight of the room as Skye scrambled in, moving toward the body on the floor.

I'm not so great with blood, I'll be honest. It makes me queasy. And there was enough of it on the floor in there that I had to resist the urge to throw up on whoever it was that was elbowing me in the side.

I couldn't tear myself away from the doorway though, as I watched Skye slide to her knees next to the chillingly still form of Coulson, putting her hands on his chest and his face as she begged him not to go anywhere.

 _"I can't lose you too,"_ She was crying, and I wondered if she was even aware that there were people all around, people watching as if this were a sideshow. Her words made me wonder, yet again, what had happened up on the deck, and a bad feeling curled low in my gut. I caught the movement of the little scientist guy - Fitz - and my mouth dried out as the pieces started to fall into place.

Fitz was wearing gloves, carefully putting what I was pretty sure used to be a human hand into some kind of box, maybe a cooler. The clenched fist was turned to stone, and inside of it was a Terrigen crystal, fully intact. Fitz closed and locked the cooler, and handed it off to one of the medics. His hands were shaking, but his expression was strangely blank. His friend, the tall black man, was holding an axe in his hand and he looked more than terrified for the both of them. The blade of the axe was bloody.

Skye's worried but encouraging murmurs followed me out into the hall as I ducked away when I couldn't stop the bile rising in my throat. It was so quiet, even with so many people standing around, that my retches echoed down the corridor.

Coulson had saved us. He'd saved the entire ship, and as the price had his own hand cut off by an _axe_.

 

 

3.

When I finally found out what had happened with Jiaying, I was also told that Skye would probably lose Cal, as well. That didn't surprise me at all, he was a dangerous man, but he did seem to have calmed down a lot since the events on that ship. He was currently being held in a vault in one of the lower levels of this SHIELD base, and when I snuck down to speak with him, he seemed like he'd been expecting me. He'd given me a long look before speaking, and said,

_"You like my daughter, don't you?"_

I was honest and told him that she was a likable woman, and he had laughed as if he pitied me.

 _"You'll have a lot to compete with."_ He didn't sound like he was rooting for me, either.

 _"Do you know if there are...many, men in her life?"_ I had tried to be as respectful as possible about the whole thing - I had no idea what would set him off. He had smiled, ruefully almost, and replied,

_"Just the one, as far as I know."_

And I knew who he was talking about, but at the time I still wasn't completely sold about their relationship. Coulson was her boss, older, reserved. I thought he was like a surrogate father. I thought that was what Cal had meant; that I needed to win the approval of Coulson.

Boy, was I wrong. I ended up never even broaching the subject with the Director, because it wasn't long before all the pieces fell into place.

I went looking for Skye after my talk with her father, because I wanted to express my remorse, my empathy, my guilt for what had happened. If I hadn't so blindly followed along in the first place, things might not have gone as badly as they had. I wanted to apologize, I wanted to gain her trust, I wanted to do _something_ positive.

It took me a half an hour, because I kept finding myself walking in circles in the halls of this stupid base, but I finally found her in the med bay. She was sitting in a chair next to Coulson's bedside, a dour look on her face as the lady scientist drew her blood. She said something no doubt reprimanding to Skye, judging by the expression on Skye's face, but Skye only looked more determined and planted her feet on the floor.

I watched from afar as the lady scientist - Simmons, right - left the room with the vial of blood in her hand. She looked concerned, but she wasn't arguing too much against Skye. I could imagine why - Skye could cave this whole place in if she wanted to.

Skye rubbed her arm and moved closer to the bed, but I was too far away to hear what she was saying. Coulson was sitting up, looking almost as pale as Skye had when I'd first come across her near the deck of the ship. He winced, his face scrunching up in pain, and Skye quickly reached for the tube that was inserted near the heavily wrapped, stubby end of his arm. It was more than likely a morphine drip, because he soon leaned his head back against the pillow and visibly sighed.

Skye reached into the bag beneath her chair and dug something out, her lips moving quickly as she spoke. Coulson turned his head toward her drowsily, and she held up what looked to be the little pastry snacks you could buy in a gas station. I frowned, because I couldn't understand why she was showing him those when he wasn't able to eat them at the moment, but he had smiled, and his shoulders shook with either a laugh or a sob. Skye had practically beamed, so I guessed it had been a laugh.

He fell asleep seconds later, and Skye carefully tucked the snacks away before moving her chair closer to his bed, and slipped her hand into his remaining one. I decided I would talk to her later.

 

 

4.

I kept quiet, for the most part, those first weeks at the base. They had let some of us stay, those that wanted to, to help work around the base and repay a bit for what we had mistakenly done to the agents before. Most of them gave us a wide berth, so we Inhumans stuck together and kept a respectful distance from everyone else.

The big guy, Axe Man, Mack - he started up a card game that ended up becoming a nightly ritual. At first, it was just him, Fitz, and the loud one, Hunter. One evening I happened to be in the kitchen while they were starting their game in the lounge, and Fitz asked me if I wanted to join in.

It surprised me a little that he was the one to open up to me first, but the other two eventually got used to my presence, and I became a usual player in this nightly ritual.

This was how I happened to be around when I first realized that Skye hadn't been avoiding me or the other Inhumans on purpose - she was just focused elsewhere. A part of me knew that she was probably ignoring her own pain by focusing on someone else's, but I wasn't her psychologist, and I wasn't about to act like it. It's not as if we were ever very close to begin with - I had no right to intrude into her life or judge her choices.

I cared about her, sure; but I was quickly realizing the depth of that emotion that was one-sided, and I like to think I'm a decent enough person to respect that.

Fitz, Mack, Hunter, Simmons, and myself were sitting in the lounge playing a rather somber game of blackjack, drinking some beer that Hunter had magically revealed from who-knows-where. Skye had walked into the kitchen, talking animatedly about something. It was a refreshing change, to see her so upbeat, and it made me smile. Coulson's presence next to her was the only reason I didn't ask her to join our game. It was a rare sight to see him out of his office, and as if Skye knew he would he uncomfortable, she dropped her voice so they wouldn't draw too much attention from the other guys.

Coulson was smiling at whatever she was telling him as he pulled out a chair and sat down at the kitchen table, but his smile looked pained. Skye's hand brushed across his shoulder as she walked behind him toward the cabinets, crouching down to dig through one of the lower ones. I watched Coulson as he grimaced while her back was turned, his hand pressing against the sling that held what was left of his other arm snug against his body.

I'd heard about it lots of times, amputees experiencing "ghost pain" of a missing limb. I felt bad for Coulson, but I had no idea what I could do for him. Yeah, I chose to fight with SHIELD and I knew he appreciated that - one of the few times we did see him around, he'd called a meeting and thanked all of us for our help, acknowledging that it wasn't easy for us to turn against our own people, even if our own people were in the wrong. I still wanted to do something for him, to thank him for giving me a chance. But I didn't know anything about amputees, or ghost pain, or anything related, that could be useful in helping him.

I am coming to realize that Coulson is a _good guy_. He genuinely has a heart for people, and knows when to praise his soldiers for making the hard call. Mack told us just the other day about how Coulson had called him into his office, and Mack had thought for sure he was going to get inventory duty for the rest of his life, but instead Coulson had _thanked_ him. Mack was in awe, really, and so were we. Especially when Hunter clued me in about Mack and Coulson butting heads before this whole war thing happened.

Is this guy _for real_? I mean, we're inhuman by name and gene, but he is something else. He is something I've only seen in the movies.

Skye sat on Coulson's right, next to him instead of across from him. She was the only person, other than Simmons, that I had seen allowed to be so close to him. And he seemed to be the only person that she allowed in her space, as well. She revealed what she'd been hiding behind her back - a package of Twizzlers, and Coulson laughed.

I looked at the other three guys I was playing cards with, meeting their eyes as they all raised their heads in confusion, each clearly wondering if he'd actually heard that noise come from Coulson. Fitz immediately took in the scene, nodded, and focused back on his cards. Hunter looked curious, but he only watched for a moment longer before returning to the cards in his hand, as well. Mack turned is gaze to me, and all I could do was blink at him. What did he expect from me, jealousy and anger? Yeah, okay, the feeling in my gut wasn't a pleasant one, and the part of me that had lived in Afterlife for so long felt a bit of outrage that Skye was interested in a _human_ \- a _SHIELD agent_ \- but I swallowed that feeling down. Mack looked back at his cards. I looked back at the kitchen table (peripherally, of course - I'm not stupid enough to blatantly stare).

Skye opened the package of candy like it was a treasure, and glanced up as she took a bite of the licorice. She smiled briefly at me, obviously approving of me getting along with the others, and I focused toward her for just long enough to smile a little back, ducking my head so she wouldn't think I wanted to have a conversation with her. I mean, I _did_ , I had so many questions, but not right now. I've learned not to interrupt her "Coulson Time", as everyone calls it.

As I turned my eyes back toward the game, completely focusing on it now instead of spying on the other two, I caught movement beneath the kitchen table. Skye's body had been turned to face Coulson, and he moved his foot so that his knee was between hers, and it was obviously a purposeful movement. Skye must have thought so too, because she turned her face back toward him and her smile was warmer, and I saw her rest her free hand on his knee.

Yes, Skye was focused outside of herself, but maybe it was good for her. I would support her from afar, and get over my crush. I had two more beers that night before we all split ways and went to bed. Skye and Coulson had moved to the couch, the bag of Twizzlers between them, and I nodded my head respectfully as I passed, trying not to look too closely at how they leaned toward one another. I would get over my crush, but it still hurt.

 

 

5.

Cal had been gone for a week or so, and then Skye had disappeared with Coulson and that shiny red car of his for almost an entire day. Many of us guessed that she was going to visit the man who no longer had any memories of her, but we didn't discuss our suspicions openly. Some of the others kept asking me if I knew anything about why Coulson had gone along with her, if any of the SHIELD team had talked about it. I was the go-to Inhuman, so to speak; the liaison between my people and Skye's people, and they assumed I had overheard something.

I hadn't; Skye's friends were curiously silent about her relationship with Coulson. As far as I knew, they didn't even discuss it amongst themselves when they thought I wasn't around. I figured maybe there was a silent pact, to keep quiet about it and not pry, so I followed along. I didn't even share my own suspicions with my friends, I just shrugged and told them maybe he was overprotective of his car.

When the two returned, it was like they were different people. I hadn't known them before, but the SHIELD people seemed ecstatic, and relieved, though they still didn't say anything about it. It was like a veil had lifted off the base; Skye and Coulson were getting back to their regular selves, so everyone else was too.

Coulson seemed more comfortable with the sling across his chest, moving around more confidently and showing his face more often around the base. He started talking with us, the Inhumans, a lot more as well, and many of the others joked behind his back that Skye must've really blown his mind during their little trip. I had frowned at them; no longer jealous, but feeling something like protectiveness wash over me. I wanted to protect her from even minimal things such as slander, but what was weirder, I wanted to protect Coulson too.

I'm not sure why, but I have this _investment_ in them, in their relationship - whatever the hell it is. They have both survived impossible things (apparently I have _no idea_ , according to Fitz, though he won't give me any details), and I find myself wanting their relationship to survive, as well. It's... encouraging. Seeing them together working, healing, eating ridiculously unhealthy food (which, where the hell were they hiding their stash?!)... for some reason these moments give me _hope_.

Yesterday I was sent to Coulson's office to ask him about new security protocols for the base. I had knocked on the door and _seriously_ thought I'd heard someone say, "come in". It was obvious after I opened the door, however, that I had misheard.

Coulson was leaning his hip against the edge of his desk, smiling down at Skye in the seat next to him. She had half of what I was pretty sure was a Cosmic Cupcake in her hand, and if discovering such an open expression on Coulson's face didn't make me feel awkward enough, the smirk on her face certainly did. Coulson had the other half of the cupcake in his hand, and I literally found myself frozen in place as I watched him shove his tongue inside to dig out the filling, his eyes trained on Skye the entire time.

She laughed and slapped his knee, leaning back in her chair as she ate her half like a normal person. Coulson laughed too, the sound surprisingly light and soft, as he finished his half as well. Luckily neither of them did anything as disturbing again with the food, but Skye did stand and press her thumb against the corner of Coulson's mouth, probably wiping away remnants of food. She then put the pad of her thumb into her mouth, her eyes on Coulson's.

The gesture was far too familiar, she was far too close to him, and they were looking at one another far too intensely. I cleared my throat and knocked on the now-open door louder, and they both whipped their heads toward me so fast it probably could have been funny.

 _"I have a question about security protocols."_ I had said, very clear and precise, and I'm proud of how I handled myself as if I hadn't seen anything that would haunt my nightmares for days.

Skye had stepped away from Coulson and he had stood up straight, both of them all smooth and suave as if nothing suspicious (or _weird_ ) had been going on. I saw Skye subtly hide the box of cupcakes underneath her jacket on the chair, but I didn't call attention to it. Coulson suggested Skye help me out, and they shared a look before we left that had me looking toward my shoes out of respect.

I spent the next couple of hours with Skye, and not once did she bring up the subject of Coulson or cupcakes. I was thankful for that, because I had no idea even how to _begin_ to apologize for seeing what I had seen. We've got another hour before dinner, so I'm hiding in my room and trying to meditate the images out of my brain.

I know what it is, now. And I realize that this is what my fellow Inhumans see in them as well. They give us hope that we could be accepted, not shunned, not hated like Jiaying had taught us. We could be loved.

**Author's Note:**

> I have never written a story in this sort of fashion before, so let me know if it's too confusing, or what I could do to make things flow better for the reader. I kind of like the idea of writing like snippets from diary entries, or letters, so I might try my hand at something like this again sometime.
> 
> (The fact that this story ended up being from Lincoln's point of view still surprises me and I'm not entirely sure how the idea came upon me in the first place. Hope that's okay. I think I still highlighted the relationship of Skye and Coulson enough for this to work for the Rom Fest?)
> 
> Thanks for reading :)


End file.
